Quiver

You touched my back when you said goodbye and I was afraid to look at you. My eyes might give me away and trap you into staying. I might start begging if I look too long into your face.
I go to work with the memory of your light touch and I long to see you again. I can't believe my wish could be granted, but there you are walking my way with a quirk of a smile and warmth in your face. Even with the space between us and the people around us, I begin to shake. Wasn't I just cold a minute ago? I wonder if my face is turning red as I turn to give a customer his change. He makes a joke and I laugh, but all I can feel is your presence nearing. My heart quivers and my stomach wrenches. How could I be falling for you so fast? I thought I had grown to be guarded and unapproachable. I had plans to become an old maid, a virgin spinster, but you make me want to change that.
I glance up to see you so close yet so far. I have another customer and you stop to talk to your friend. Will we be able to talk? My break is soon, will you wait for me? I look up again and see you walking away. My soul screams in frustration and I silently call for you to turn around. When you do all I can do is smile and mouth goodbye. You mouth goodbye back and it feels like a private moment. In that second we are alone and there aren't counter tops separating us. Your eyes light up, could you be feeling the same thing? Were you silently calling to me as I was for you?
I try to throw myself back into my job with my head and heart spinning. I numbly hear "Audrey, are you shaking?"

All for one

I think I finally figured out a small piece of the world while burying my head under a pillow tonight. The opposite sex is sure interesting and a little frustrating.

Here I am, happy with my present lifestyle of work, home and making new friends. And meeting their delicious brother. Damn, I fell fast for the kid, but I'm trying to keep composure.

So, I've got a love interest. Good for me! I was starting to wonder… But now I worry that the next time I see Dakota I might take a bite, and will it me or him that is in more danger.

And if that isn't enough conflict bouncing around in my head and heart, I have a suspicion that drama is coming at me in TWO other directions. After 3 months of work, all of a sudden I'm starting to feel the press of male attention from a nice guy who is a year younger than me, and a man 11 years my senior. I'm feeling okay with the focus, just because I know nothing is serious at the moment, but I can't be involved with a coworker. I fear the drama and the awkwardness that would follow. If I am not careful I could get into a sticky situation.

Why are they coming out of the woodwork now? I think it is because I am becoming a part of the store. I'm not the new girl anymore. I'm still a mystery but I am available for examination. Personally I think that both of my coworkers have too much baggage for my taste. Nice guy has a child and my senior… I have no idea about him. I'm not interested in them like I am Dakota. The only thing is that he is three years younger than me, but at least he isn't ELEVEN!

I wonder if I'm exuding a pheromone because I'm lusting for a guy. I'm a virgin, but could it be possible I'm giving off a feeling to the opposite sex?

Could it be… am I actually making assumptions about the attentiveness just because of my own awareness of my own sensibilities? Gasp!

Second glances

I have only met you twice, but I want to tell you how much I like you. Would you think me a silly girl, or could I cause your heart to thump? Could you possibly like me back? I'm three years older than you, and your sister told me your last girlfriend was three years younger. I'm an old maid. In a different century, I would be closing in on spinsterhood. Then again, some old guy may have picked me up. Must not have the charms necessary for the modern man.
For an innocent, I am surprised at my yearnings for you. You presence makes the pulse in my neck to jump, and I fear you will see the tattoo. I like your height and stature. You're so beautiful. Approachable, manly, humorous, friendly. I want to know more about you.
I'm trying so hard not to seem to eager. Can't be scaring you off before I get a chance! But I don't want to come off as indifferent. Damn, why isn't this easier? It always hurts when I fall, and you have me on edge.

Goodness, I hope I see you soon though I might rip off your shirt and nip the sculpted abs I'm sure you have. (and i am trying not to imagine the things i really want to do to you)